Celebrating our brilliant brains

"We can no longer ignore the neuroscience"

Dr Judith Howard

In education, we can no longer afford to ignore the neuroscience. This was a statement shared with us at a course I attended last year. As a neuro-nerd I couldn't agree more with this sentiment, we need to embrace the learning that science can share with us and let it inform what we do in our classrooms. It is also important that we share this knowledge with our learners. 

 

With this in mind we have started our teaching year with a focus on our brilliant brains and how we learn. And so far it's been fun. There is a wealth of great material online and we have used video, movement, art, discussion and writing to support our learning. 

One of the clips we started with was Ned the Neuron. We actually watched it three days in a row and it is on our class website for further revisits if individuals want to. The first time we watched it I paused at various spots. The class loved being able to say neuroplasticity! We talked about what sorts of things help our brains get stronger, we talked about challenges. In subsequent viewings we focused on different aspects to explore further. 

When we discussed the brain growing and challenges we used the example of learning how to walk to help us understand better. I asked one of our classmates to demonstrate what happens when a baby first tries to walk... our actor did a brilliant job of showing the baby falling over and then trying again and again. We talked about what happened when the baby first fell over and I asked the following rhetorical questions... Did the baby just stop there and go "oh well I tried walking but it didn't work for me so I guess I won't be a walker"? Did the baby go "walking is dumb, crawling is better and I like it better"? Did the baby just stop there and scream out "it just not fair, I can't walk, I can't do this"? and so on. The class laughed as we went through these scenarios and each time we were able to say that no-one would ever learn to walk if we did this. We related this to our own challenges. 

After this we talked about how when we learn something we make new connections and the more we try things the stronger the connections get. We talked about how learning something new or different can feel really hard at first but that is OK, that is what challenge can feel like, just like the baby learning to walk. We stood up and started off being like a neuron sitting there and trying something new and slowly, with a bit of effort, stretched one arm out and then kept going stretching our fingers out too. Then we stretched our other arm and fingers. After that we stretched out one leg and then another. Slowly and with effort until we were standing like strong stars. 

We talked about things that we find challenging and that different people find different things more challenging than others... again that is OK, we are all unique! 

After this we noticed when we were challenged and our mantra in class became 'we try and try again', sometimes adding... 'just like the baby learning to walk'. We notice when we make mistakes and now we know that making mistakes is part of learning, it helps our neurons stretch and grow. 

We have also been watching the Class Dojo Growth Mindset series. There are 5 clips in total and here is the first: 

These clips further expand on the notion that through accepting challenges and persisting when we find something tricky we can improve our learning. We can strengthen our brain. 

To support our learning about the brain we have made images and written short descriptions about one of our amazing neurons. Just like us our brains, which are made up of billions of neurons, all our images are unique and interesting. 

As are our descriptions. Here are a few examples: 

My neuron’s name is Excellent Swimmer. My neuron gets stronger when I sleep. My neuron likes water. My neuron needs challenges. My neuron loves ice cream. My neuron is as nice as chocolate.

My neuron’s name is Bob. He gets stronger when I learn. Bob likes to run. Bob needs food and water.  Bob loves hugs. Bob is awesome.

My neuron is Geoff. My neuron gets stronger by making mistakes. My neuron likes apples. My neuron needs lots of love. My neuron loves sleep. My neuron is strong.

My neuron’s name is Joe. My neuron gets stronger when I give myself a challenge. My neuron likes it when I give it food. My neuron needs water to live. My neuron loves it when I take it to cool places. My neuron is clever and friendly.

My neuron’s name is Disgust. My neuron gets stronger when I work really hard at working out problems. My neuron likes trying out words. My neuron loves the best hugs ever. My neuron is brainy.

My neuron’s name is Bob. Bob is very cool. My neuron likes to do rugby. MY neuron gets stronger when I make mistakes. Bob needs food and water. Bob loves to do maths. My neuron is wonderful.

Our classroom is known as Room 5 the Place to Stretch and Grow. We have developed a learning chant (an idea I have taken from the latest Teachers Matter Conference which I will write about in due course) and are practicing it regularly... we are developing actions to support this

.

 It is exciting to hear the language the children are using which is empowering. They are encouraging each other to persist. They are celebrating attempts. They are noticing when they have learned something new and they are sharing this knowledge with each other. 

This has been a great start to celebrating our brilliant brains. We are also practicing strategies to help us learn better. Our next steps will be exploring our magic brain and learning the Stop, Breathe, Think, Do technique to help us get back in balance and think more clearly when we get out of synch.

To read more about this you can check out some other posts in this blog: 

Learning with the brain in mind

Managing difficult behaviour with the brain in mind

Letting go to keep moving ahead

Getting over a painful experience is much like crossing the monkey bars...
you have to let go at some point in order to move forward. C.S. Lewis

I like this analogy, I like it a lot. If we hold on too long then we might fall off altogether but we do have a choice!

Life is full of ups and downs, to be fair some people have had more than their fair share of disappointments. I have met a few people in recent months who have gone through significant change in their lives and the thing that comes through so strongly is the power that our attitude has on our ability to make peace with our circumstances (current or past!).

I remember hearing Robyn Moore speaking a long time ago about gratitude and forgiveness, how the act of gratitude helps us let go and move forward. During the session she got us to think of a past hurt and the people who were connected with it and then suggested that we think about what we can be grateful to those people for. At the time I struggled with this. She talked about the ability in that moment of gratitude for us to find forgiveness so we could move forward. It wasn't until a number of years had passed that this really made sense to me. Like a lot of folk I had had a bad relationship and it ended in hurt. I had moved on largely but it wasn't until one day driving in incredibly icy conditions where I really understood what Robyn was talking about. As I came to a steep downhill section, I was extremely nervous, the road ahead was treacherous... and at that moment it occurred to me to use engine breaking which my ex-partner had taught me. When I had navigated the worst of it for some reason the words of Robyn came back and it all made sense. I felt lighter, I felt really free.

There is a wise old saying that goes something like this, holding onto anger is like holding a hot coal and expecting the other person/people to get burnt. All is does is hurt us, it uses our energy, it has the capacity to sap our joy... all while the other party is usually quite unaware that any hurt or anger remains. I can't say that I have mastered this but the awareness I now have has helped hugely with more recent disappointments and given me a strategy to manage the ups and downs. Developing an attitude of gratitude is worth the effort.

I guess this also about owning our feelings rather than allowing your emotions to be dictated by others- we are not puppets and whilst we may not be responsible for the circumstances we find ourselves in, we do have power over our own emotions. This does not mean we will not feel anger or hurt or disappointment, of course we will and rightly so, but if we stay angry or hurt or disappointed then we need to look at ourselves and ask if we are hanging on to a monkey bar or hot coal that is no longer serving us. If we are holding on to those negative emotions we are potentially causing ourselves deeper hurt, greater pain.

We deserve every joy that life offers us and too often miss it when our hearts and minds are cluttered with unresolved anger. So, in thinking about this, who or what in your life could you from something to be grateful for so you can keep on swinging ahead in your life?

Image sourced: http://www.barbarabutler.com/glossary.php?doc_id=1104936268&section=climbing

Happy, healthy, resilient people do it better

In my last post I talked about the importance of having a wellbeing perspective in the front of our minds when teaching others. I talked about happy, healthy, resilient people learning better. 
As I was writing it I kept thinking that this doesn't only apply to teaching and learning, in fact I think it applies to so many different settings it is kind of a good mantra for life really. 

How we feel influences how we think which then influences how we act. Happy healthy people make better decisions, they have the brain space to think more clearly and therefore respond more thoughtfully. Their sense of esteem is higher and generally speaking I think when we are happier, healthier and more resilient we feel more competent and confident.   

Happy, healthy, resilient people work better 
The wellbeing of those we work with is important. I genuinely believe that part of my role as a leader is to be aware of what is happening for the people I work with because I am then in a better position to support and empower them to do the best job they can in the circumstances. Feeling like you are doing a good job and that what you do is important and valued is a helpful part of building self esteem which contributes to a greater sense of wellbeing which in turn creates better outcomes at work. If our people are able to perform well then our whole organisation succeeds so it makes business sense to encourage wellbeing in the team as well as the obvious moral obligation.
As a leader of a geographically diverse team it meant that communication was key. I read and re-read messages before I sent them out to ensure that as much as possible I was avoiding mixed messages or increasing anxiety or stress, to be fair I didn't always get it right but I tried. Listening to what people said about themselves and others, listening out for anything that was a bit out of character and following up in some way was vital. I guess it came down to knowing my team, staying aware and being available as well as encouraging networks where possible to provide support. 

Happy, healthy, resilient people play better
If you are involved in a team or social group of any description then this is a useful thought to keep in mind. Recently in our little township we went through quite an upheaval when a major employer in the district downsized significantly. This had an impact on our small group of volunteer parents at our local playcentre, and remaining mindful about that was vital in keeping things moving along and our children continuing to have a great time learning in a positive social environment. In order to do this checking in with people helped. Asking every so often asking how people were getting on and if they were OK helped, but listening helped most. It is great that we have a community of parents who ensured that people were supported and had someone to talk to. 
If everyone on the team is working to support the others then all can be at their best, it goes back to what a theatrical director of mine used to say (in fact she still does) that if everyone on stage is working to make everyone else look great then we will have a great performance. This is relates so beautifully to any team. 

Happy, healthy, resilient people behave better 
I have a three year old and he is amazing (of course I am biased). One of the things that makes him amazing is that when things are out of balance he will let me know, often it is behavioural rather than verbally stated. For example, when I have been on the computer for too long he will climb on my knee, pushing the laptop away and grab my face telling me to look at him. Now, at that time I have a choice, I can give him a little of what he needs to get back in balance or push him away. Pushing him away does not solve my problem nor does it resolve his. In this moment I can lean into connection, self-regulation is built through co-regulation, it's my job as the adult in the relationship to support his growth. This sometimes means putting down the computer for five minutes and having a tickle time. 
This does not only relate to children. If we are out of balance and our needs are going unmet even as adults we may act out. Potentially we act out in more subtle ways but it still impacts on our relationships. In the workplace we may find that people start gossiping, holding back information, undermining others, becoming aggressive or withdrawn, avoiding responsibility, missing deadlines, becoming unwell and the list goes on. Not really productive behaviours. At home we may see some of the same things, and again they won't help make a happy home. I am not suggesting that we need to instigate a tickle time policy for the workplace (although it could make it a whole lot more fun) but encouraging that instead of reacting to the behaviour of others first exploring why that behaviour is occurring. As someone once said 'all behaviour is communication'. 

Happy, healthy, resilient people lead better 
I know as leaders (at work, in social or community groups, in our homes) we need to be mindful of the needs of those around us but we also need to be aware of our own levels of health, happiness and resilience. Seeking support and guidance is not weakness, it is a key tool to build positive resilience. Taking a measure of your own wellbeing regularly will help you recognise when things are getting out of balance so you can act early rather than fall into a downward spiral of stress-overload, unnecessary mistakes, time mismanagement and increasing dismay. 
As followers, supporters, colleagues of leaders we also need to be mindful of where they are at as well. We want our leaders to be as well and strong as they can be, not in an aggressive manner, but in those skills that can make them a positive influence on our workplaces, community/social groups and homes. Often as a leader people don't ask you how you are, you are expected to be on form and if you are not then assumptions are made that may not be fair or reasonable. I go back to what I said earlier about all behaviour being communication... these leaders in our lives are people too and to have the opportunity to be able to be human and still respected really does make a difference. 

At the end of the day I guess this all boils down to communication and relationships. 
Forming positive relationships with those around you supports that sense of wellbeing. What makes individuals feel happy and healthy and resilient will differ, we are all unique after all, so being able to support those around you appropriately is key (or at least making an attempt to!) 
How we communicate is just as important as what we say, sometimes more so. Some people just need someone to listen to them, others want advice, some just want peace and quiet whist others may want to get out and about and do something new. Stephen Covey in his 7 Habits of Highly Effective People talks about communicating with loved ones and suggests that if we listen, empathise, appreciate and affirm then that will help. There are many ways to communicate, just be aware that the message you are sending is not always the message that is received so it is best to tune in to others, be mindful and truly connect. 

Why teaching and learning through health and wellbeing makes sense

I am going back to my roots today. I am a teacher, although the term educator is probably more apt, and I have also specialised in the health and wellbeing field for a number of years. It is from this place that a lot of what I have been writing about this year comes from.

Health and wellbeing are essential for learning. Having respectful relationships, managing ourselves and so much more... if we want more pleasant people in our communities it might pay to check that their needs are being met first!

WHO has the following definition "Health is a state of complete physical, mental and social well-being and not merely the absence of disease or infirmity." For me this means that it is vital to address health within any teaching and learning situation, it is about social justice and providing opportunities for all to develop to their fullest potential. 

However it would seem that this isn't always as highly valued in the discourse about education, at least in the media. Perhaps it is because the outcomes that we seek are not easily measured or reported in quantifiable terms, to see the results we need to look at the whole person and how they develop over time and in different settings. Perhaps it is because those big outcomes we look for are things that need a multifaceted approach, not just what happens in school hours, our learning in health is happening all the time. If we think about health concerns like obesity, bullying and behavioural issues we are looking at a radical change and that doesn't happen overnight or at the end of a two week unit before we move into the next thing. Health and wellbeing of our learners are a concern for the whole community, not just the school, but when looking at teaching and learning I advocate for health as an important curriculum subject and even moreso for wellbeing as a lens through which we teach (I know that we are all passionate about various subject areas and a literacy teacher may well advocate that literacy should be the lens but please read on...) so it is present in our thinking throughout our planning, delivery and evaluation processes.

Happy, healthy, resilient people learn better 

Like many folk I believe that happy, healthy, resilient people learn better and having a wellbeing lens in place will support us to help our learners improve these aspects.


Firstly, if our basic needs are not being met then our brains are not operating to their full potential. It is said that what is needed for a healthy body is also needed for a healthy brain and if you think about it that largely makes good sense. If we are underfed or poorly fed then our brain is not getting the fuel it needs to help build the neurotransmitters required. Sleep, among other needs, is also part of the recipe for neurotransmitter production. Serotonin and dopamine are essential for emotional regulation and memory, both useful in learning, so if we do not have enough of these we are on the back foot.
When we feel unsafe we often work from a hypervigilant perspective, on alert looking out for potential threats, therefore less able to access those higher functions for deep learning and securing memory.
So addressing basic needs in teaching and learning environments as much as we are able (and I know this is hugely challenging in some areas) then the better prepared the brain is for learning.

Emotional intelligence and self awareness are essential for managing ourselves and developing positive relationships with others. When we are able to identify and name our feelings we are better able to cope with them so we can then move on or get support. It means we will not expend energy and thinking time unnecessarily allowing us the opportunity to focus on the learning at hand. Having healthy ways to cope with negative emotions and stress is one tool which contributes to positive resilience.

I have been reading Dan Siegel's book, Brainstorm and another thing that a health and wellbeing focus provides our young learners with are skills to support prefrontal integration. Developing healthy patterns of behaviour like mindfulness help us navigate through the potential risks of adolescence and encourage the ability to focus on individual tasks.

We are preparing our children for an uncertain future... we do not really know what they will face or what skills they will need but it is likely that interpersonal skills, coping with change, being aware of one's own thinking (metacognition), managing ourselves and critical literacy (questioning what we are being told through varied media) will all be vital going forward. With a wellbeing mindset we can ensure that these things are being catered for within our teaching and learning programmes.

Some implications 

The list above is not an exhaustive list, there are many possible benefits for learning if we adopt a health and wellbeing lens. As you will see in the diagrams used happy, healthy and resilient behaviours and qualities are interdependent and interrelated.

As teachers we need to have mental headspace and time to ask ourselves, or the learners themselves, some of the following questions:

• "what is happening right now for this individual?"
• "what is the most important need for them?" 
• "what can I do to help/support this person so they are better able to learn?"

We need awareness so we can support and guide those who need it.

It may be that their basic needs are not being addressed fully, perhaps there is something going on at home that is really distressing. As teachers (in any setting) we cannot control the external environment our learners come from however if we have an understanding we may be able to provide support to bolster aspects of wellbeing that will enable them to get more from the learning opportunity than they would if we did nothing.
If there is something we can do to improve outcomes and opportunities then in the interest of social justice we need to be able to do it.

None of what I am saying is necessarily easy. Nor is it confined to teaching and learning in schools. We have learners in tertiary institutions, we have learners in the workplace, we may have people who are studying in our home (like our children for example), we may belong to a community group where people are engaged in learning... in all these settings and more, supporting these learners through the lens of wellbeing will help them to get more out of the learning opportunities they are presented with.

As stated earlier, there is good reason to support the wellbeing of our learners, and I believe long term it may help make our communities healthier, happier, stronger places for us to live. 

Don't pack the concrete mixer!

We don't need a concrete mixer in our resilience toolbox. 

Lately I have been working on a presentation about resiliency that I will be giving next week and as I have been working I have been getting hooked up on the topic of 'hardening up'.  In fact I could nearly do a whole presentation about that small aspect in itself! So instead I'll put some of my thoughts down here...

A common analogy used when talking about resilience is that it is like having a toolbox. I like this analogy. The more tools we have the better prepared we are to cope with the pitfalls of life. Like a builder, we need to have our toolbox packed before we go to the job, we need to know how to use our tools before we go to the job and we need to ensure that they are in good working order before we go to the job, replacing what is broken as we go along. To be as resilient as possible in difficult times we need to practice the behaviours that support our sense of well-being in our good times.

When considering the tools to carry we need to ensure we only pack those things that will support us in times of stress and, because of this, I strongly suggest we don't pack a concrete mixer... for one reason it's incredibly heavy to carry. For another reason, I see it as a tool that contributes to hardening up which seems to me to create more problems.

I am not sure what it is like in other countries but in New Zealand it feels like there is a strong culture of 'hardening up'. When we 'harden up' we suppress our vulnerability, our emotions get pushed down every time they feel uncomfortable. Sometimes we are taught to 'harden up' when we are young, when we cry or become distressed. This is meant to help us become strong and resilient, but I think it does the opposite in the long run. It also teaches the young person that exhibiting their emotions and working through them makes other people uncomfortable too.

What I think happens when we continually 'harden up' is that we learn how to not cope effectively with our uncomfortable emotions which can lead to developing negative coping strategies such as blaming others, drug or alcohol abuse, self harm, violence and unnecessary risk taking. We feel weak asking for help so don't, even though we may very well need it. "Hardening up" can also diminish the emotional range an individual feels. Instead of experiencing a full range of emotions, from what I have seen, the range can reduce to a spectrum of anger and happiness. When scared or worried or sad this is expressed as anger, otherwise these hardened up folk seem happy enough but genuine joy can become elusive. I also believe for some people this limits their ability to empathise with others and so affects their interpersonal relationships.

It is a tough way to live because all those other emotions are sitting there underneath broiling away and sometimes it takes just a little pitfall for them to bubble over, like a volcano where the pressure has become too much. The fall out can be devastating for the individual and the people around them. In some cases I believe that this contributes to mental health issues, domestic violence, violent crime, suicide, addiction, divorce... you get the picture.

We can be better than this though, and I think that a start is to stop 'hardening up' our kids. I am no expert but I figure we can help our kids develop their emotional intelligence in various ways, such as:
1. be a positive role model- let them see you working through your emotions in positive ways
2. help them learn the language of feelings/emotions- if we can name what we are feeling then we can start working on ways to work through the feeling... and the more broad our emotional vocabulary the more able we are to narrow the focus on how to resolve it appropriately if it is one of those uncomfortable feelings that we don't like
3. help them identify strategies that work for them- when they are losing it, and who doesn't from time to time, we can present our kids with options such as I can see you are feeling frustrated, would you like to go and do something else for a few minutes or do you want to sit here with me? As we present them with different options they will start to learn what works for them and we can support their use of positive appropriate strategies as they learn and grow
4. accept that our kids will sometimes feel crabby- most of us feel crabby from time to time so rather than telling them our kids shouldn't feel like that (who needs to feel guilty for feeling what you are really feeling eh?) perhaps we could help them identify the feeling and acknowledge it. (I know that this isn't always easy, like in the middle of the supermarket!)
5. talk about feelings- when we are watching a movie or reading a book with our children, talk to them about the characters feelings and what they might do etc. Just where relevant of course, don't destroy the joy of the moment by over-analysing things though!

These are just some small ideas about an issue that I think is really important. I know that some of them are easier to say than do and that there are days that with the best will in the world we just don't handle things the way we'd like... it's OK because we are human. If we make a mistake then we can apologise, that is what we would expect from our kids after all, and then we move forward from there. If we need help we can ask for it, for what it's worth I think that asking for help is a sign of strength not weakness.

There is a whole lot of reading material online if you are interested. Maggie Dent, Daniel Goleman and Brainwave Trust are all good places/people to look at for more information about resilience and emotional intelligence especially for our little people :)

Image from: http://ghost32writer.com/?tag=maximizer-concrete

Filling up tanks

My last post was focused on resilience and I finished with a comment about kindness to others being a great way to support their resilience so this post sort of comes from that... please forgive me if I repeat myself a little from previous posts but a lot of this knits together- it is like weaving a tapestry of thoughts and ideas really.  

In order for us to respond at our best our brains need to be able to work at their best. Our brains are the most amazing chemical factories, producing the chemicals that help our cells communicate and make us think, feel and do. Some of these chemicals aid memory, create feelings of relaxation or joy, support our decision making skills and so forth. Now it's like these chemicals are stored in little tanks at the end of brain cells and as different chemicals are needed a small amount is released, the message is passed on and the thought, memory, feeling or action happens (or not as the case may be but we won't go into that here). Some of the chemical may be returned to its tank after use but not all and not always so the brain is constantly making more... and the brilliant thing is we can help our brain fill up those tanks. Not only that, we can help fill other people's tanks too. 

Our positive behaviours have a huge impact on brain function and supporting the filling of our tanks. Fulfilling basic needs is a great start- drinking water, breathing clean fresh air, eating a balanced diet with plenty of fruit and veg, getting enough sleep, exercise and positive contact with others. Add to this managing our stress, feeling safe where we live, go to school or work, laughter, connecting with nature, giving, helping others, learning something new, taking responsible risks, moments of success, acts of kindness, getting out of your comfort zone, practicing gratitude, setting goals, having good things to look forward to, listening to music, being creative... I am sure you get the picture.    

I maintain that one of the most important positive relationships we need to foster is the one we have with ourselves. What we say to ourselves is really important. The brain is amazing and works really hard to make what we think and feel become real so if we call ourselves 'dumb' or 'stupid' then the brain will look for ways to reinforce that. I figure that our brain is just trying to make us feel that we are right. And the more we say something the harder the brain will work to make it true. So it stands to reason that breaking the habit of negative self talk and replacing it with a new positive self talk habit is a good idea. 

I was given a copy of the poem Truth by a group of students in Ranfurly a long time ago when we were talking about what we say and the difference we can make to someone else, it is something I have always remembered and I think it is well worth finishing with this. What we hear said about us and to us can help us frame our own self talk so we need to be mindful, especially with our children. Words are powerful and they can fill or empty someone's tanks including your own... words are powerful, kindness is key, use your power wisely and your kindness freely. 

Truth
By Barrie Wade (he is a poet and author, click here for a link to a couple of his books)

Sticks and stones may break my bones, 
but words can also hurt me. 
Stones and sticks break only skin, 
while words are ghosts that haunt me. 

Slant and curved the word-swords fall
to pierce and stick inside me. 
Bats and bricks may ache through bones,
but words can mortify me.

Pain from words has left its scar
on mind and heart that’s tender. 
Cuts and bruises now have healed;
it’s words that I remember. 


Some resources that might be useful for you: 
The Neurological Foundation of NZ has a great poster to reinforce some brain healthy behaviours, click here for a copy to print and the Mental Health Foundation of NZ has these resources for printing as well.   

Bouncing Back

Bouncing back

I believe resilience is vital to wellbeing and have been really interested in this for a long time so thought I'd share some thoughts today. 

Andrew Fuller (http://www.andrewfuller.com.au) describes resilience as the “happy knack of being able to bungy jump through the pitfalls of life.” I quite like this description for a number of reasons, and not only because I enjoy Andrew Fuller’s work. Three key phrases from this statement are:  

Happy knack- implies a positive sense of self efficacy, a can-do-ness vibe (I know that isn’t a real word but I think it should be)

Bungy jump- is about bouncing back but I think we are often changed in some way as we know experience changes brain circuitry 

Pitfalls of life- without the ups and downs of life we would be flatlined (a.k.a. dead) so highs and lows are not always a bad thing, they can help us to grow and learn and keep life interesting 

Resilience is not something that can be given to people, it can't be taught per se, there isn't a one size fits all and it is not a constant. Our resilience levels shift and change depending on our experience, circumstances, our own health and the events happening around us at a given time.

Resilience to me is about having tools or options for when times are tough or things go wrong.  

If we see resilience as a bit of a toolbox or kete (basket) then the greater variety of tools we have access to then we are better able to be resilient. As an example, my father passed away four years ago, through the grief process I have realised there were times when I would naturally go to dad for support, he was part of my toolbox, and now that he wasn't there I had to find other ways to help myself bounce back. This impacted on my sense of resilience as I needed to develop new strategies at the same time as coping with a major loss.  

The pitfalls of life are not always something to be avoided. In fact through adversity our sense of resiliency can sometimes be strengthened, if we get through a tough time we may be able to breed a stronger sense of can-do-ness, an “I can cope” mentality.

A little aside about pitfalls is that what my 40+ years worth of experience calls adversity will be different to my 3 year old’s perspective and it will also be different to my 40+ year old friends and colleagues as well. So, as a teacher, if I have a 5 year old who has lost a pencil and is upset I need to acknowledge that I don’t know what his/her experience of loss is. We now have an opportunity to help him/her identify or develop tools so in future s/he may be better prepared to cope with a similar loss. 

Also the tools that work for me may well be different to those that work for someone else and tools used in the past may not work as well for future adversity or alternatively may provide a platform to build from depending on the circumstance. As I said earlier, it is not a one-size-fits-all thing.

So what does your toolbox look like?

If we were a builder we wouldn’t turn up to a job with only a hammer, we would have a range of tools available, just in case. Like the builder I think that we need to have a range of tools to help us in times of stress and it is best that the majority of these tools are packed before we are faced with a serious situation so pretending/role play, rehearsing, discussing what ifs, reading about things and establishing positive healthy habits may all help. There is also the role of prior experience e.g. having changed roles in the past I am more aware of the impact of this sort of significant change and am better able to cope this time round.

We know that the brain works better when stress is handled well, our can-do-ness will come in to play when we are able to access our brain’s higher functions (see my previous post re brain and stress)  so it makes sense that those things that help to open the doors could be good tools for a starter:

• ·         Balanced diet – think about fresh fruit and veg and minimising takeaways and sweet treats
• ·         Exercise and stretching
• ·         Adequate sleep
• ·         Love/kindness
• ·         Positive relationships
• ·         Sense of belonging/connectedness  
• ·         Sense of purpose
• ·         Doing something to help someone else
• ·         Ensuring you are hydrated (water is best by the way!)
• ·         Breathing
• ·         Practicing gratitude
• ·         Time out
• ·         Positive self talk/affirmations
• ·         Connecting with nature
• ·         The things that you do that fill your soul…

What other items would you add to this list?

Please note: I believe those tools that are used regularly are more likely to be those that we use when we need them, so the more we practice every day the better prepared we are for those tough times.  

Just as a little parting thought as I know I have talked a lot about us as individuals in this post... if our default attitude with others is one of kindness then I believe we have the power to potentially have a positive impact on someone's resiliency, especially if they are in one of those pitfalls. Stay aware because we never know who we might be influencing.   

Self leadership

Last time I was writing the focus was on stress and the brain... and one thing that I have reflected on since is the impact this has on you personally. That has lead me to thinking about self leadership.

A quote for self leadership me thinks :)

I am thinking that mastery over our thoughts is at the heart of self leadership. This is not necessarily an easy task. As we were talking in my last post when we are under stress our ability to access our higher cognitive functions is impaired, doors are shut or at least a little sticky, and the greater the stress the more likely we are to become bogged down in the red room of few options, the react rather than respond space. 

In order to gain mastery over our thoughts we first need to gain awareness of our thinking. I like to think that there is a little portion of ourselves watching what we are doing with dispassionate fascination, and if we can tap in to that little watcher we are better able to recognise our own thoughts. We can watch our thoughts at different times and in different situations, we can then become better predictors of our behaviour. 

This awareness also comes down to hearing how we talk to and about ourselves. Without self awareness it is too easy to become an enemy within. The negative self critical voice can start quite young, we can hear children say things like... 'I can't do that' and 'I am bad at maths' (or an alternative subject/task), worse still we hear things like 'I'm stupid' or 'I'm dumb'. As we go on this voice might say things like the following to us 'you don't deserve love', 'you are unworthy', 'everyone is against you', 'you always screw things up' etc. (We wouldn't talk to our best friends like this!) This voice often becomes louder when we are not operating from our thinking room, and we are less able to offer it a strong counter argument so it can be quite convincing if we are not mindful. 

If we have greater self knowledge we will better know those things that build us up and those that break us down. When we are faced with stressful situations we can bring into action those things that build us up which will help to quieten that negative voice. When we are in a situation where we are working with things that are bringing us down we can challenge our own self judgements and again harness the energy of what builds us up. It comes down to being aware... of ourselves and the environment around us and taking action when we can. 

Be mindful and become your own best friend as part of the journey to self leadership. 

Stress and the brain

So lately I seem to have seen and read a bit about stress, the brain and development. This is something that I have been interested in for a long time as a health educator, teacher and leader. 

From my understanding, experience and learning it would appear that the brain learns and thinks better in a calm and happy place ... not really new news at all. Glenn Capelli describes it beautifully and simply in his Magic Brain model where the brain is divided into three main rooms; a blue thinking room, a multi-coloured feeling room, and the red room of fight flight or freeze. Fear and stress takes us into the red room and shuts the doors to the other rooms so our brain has really limited options, in fact it can just react to the threat. (For more information check out the Thinking Learning Classroom by Glenn Capelli and Sean Brealey.) This is supported by other research- click here for another clip from the ChildTrauma Academy Channel that explains impact of stress on brain functioning really well. 

I think this is important knowledge for us when working with others and also in our own self mastery. 

• As a teacher, if you are working with parents or children in a stressful situation then they may be operating more from the red room. 
• As an employer, if you have an employee who has suffered a loss or is coping with change then they may be operating more from the red room. 
• As a parent, if your child is having problems at school, not fitting in, struggling with the work or dealing with bullying and feeling powerless, they too may be operating from the red room. 
• If you are under stress, you too may be operating from the red room more. And if we are thinking from the red room then we are more likely to react than respond. 

For those of us in leadership positions (in our work, in a classroom, in our families) I suggest this awareness could have a powerful impact on our behaviour and therefore those around us. I spoke in an earlier blog about Celia Lashlie suggesting that we need to sit alongside those we are working with, to empathise, to be prepared to enter into their reality and then to show moral courage ... we need to step back from our own place of judgement and make it safe for people so they can open the doors to feel more widely and then be able to think more clearly and perhaps then come to their own solutions around the stressful situations they are living with. This approach could then lead to greater resilience through a knowledge that they are capable, which in turn helps them escape the red room of limited options and potentially be more able to reach their own potential. 

This understanding also impacts on the environment we create, our learning, home or work environment. If it is one of fear or stress or condemnation then it is likely to produce more red room responses- a quote about teaching that I like goes along the lines that "it is that the teacher dictates the weather in the classroom" ... I think this applies in all situations where we are leading. 

Below is the quote by Haim Ginott which I have seen in several school staff rooms. I wonder what would happen if we each took this on board, knowing that we can make a difference to those around us and their thinking potential and by doing so also help ourselves? (Wee tip: try exchanging workplace/home for classroom, leader for teacher etc)  

I have come to a frightening conclusion.
I am the decisive element in the classroom.
It is my personal approach that creates the climate.
It is my daily mood that makes the weather.
As a teacher I possess tremendous power to make a child's life miserable or joyous.
I can be a tool of torture or an instrument of inspiration.
I can humiliate or humor, hurt or heal.
In all situations, it is my response that decides whether a crisis
will be escalated or de-escalated, and a child humanized or de-humanized.

Between Teacher and Child